Drug tests

Something to give you a headache (because I love you all that much)...

A co-worker came to me Monday morning and told me how she's been having problems with her son and drug use. The kid tested positive at a hospital last week for THC and PCP.

Don't ask.

So, the co-worker was concerned about her 15-year old daughter and her 15-year old boyfriend.

What did she do? Drug tested the kid. Outta the blue. She called her husband downstairs and made him stand in the bathroom as the kid peed in a cup.

I looked at her, stunned.

"You know you just walked right into a potential lawsuit, right?" I asked.

She blinked. "Huh?"

"Let's see... your husband could be charged with child molestation 'cause he watched the kid drop trousers and pee. I'm sure drug testing someone else's kid infringes upon all sorts of minor's rights and stuff."

"But he's hanging out with my daughter."

"So talk to HIS parents. Or call the police if you think the kid is doing drugs."

"Oh. Could I go to jail?"

I shrugged. "I'm no lawyer. I dunno. I suppose."

"Well, he tested negative for everything," she said proudly.

I felt that headache behind my eyes come on again.

This morning, she came to me and said: "The parents called me last night and thanked me for drug testing their son. Apparently, they've been wanting to do the same thing, but they haven't been able to afford the drug test kit."

That headache is now here to stay.